Wound / Affect(ion) / Beget – by BRANDON STANWYCK

 

Wound

 

the wound he won’t

 

let heal

 

leaves me scarred.

 

i well up when

 

his eyes

 

refuse to cry.

 

the blood in his

 

boxer briefs

 

burns my dreams.

 

why do that to

 

a boy,

 

to feel…powerful?

 

now are you a

 

real man,

 

since raping him?

 

i sincerely hope you

 

feel big

 

and so strong.

 

because if you don’t,

 

my friend

 

broke for nothing.

 


 

Affect(ion)

 

i surrender so many fucks

 

because you refuse to give a single one.

 

my fucks perish trying to prove my love;

 

yours still have a price tag.

 

(do you plan on returning them?

 

i mean, it’s not like you’re gonna use ’em.)

 

all i want is to get back just

 

a shred of what i spend,

 

my whole heart for a sliver of yours.

 

i’m at a loss—i’ve:

 

begged with touch, beseeched with words

 

and ceded all of my available time.

 

every part of me is in your hands, except

 

my dick since i guess you’re so bored by it,

 

though you know better than anyone

 

that i practically worship yours. well

 

whenever you wish to bestow it upon me,

 

i have got just the spot.

 

…i’m still waiting on that fuck


 

Beget

 

to love a non-lover

 

is my heart’s worst

 

repeat offense…

 

cannibalizing itself

 

to mend broken boys

 

whom it cannot help

 

but fall in love with,

 

having oft glimpsed at

 

their tender hearts

 

with eager devotion—

 

unaware that they, while

 

affable and sweet

 

at first,

 

are in actuality aloof

 

and somewhat frosty

 

—but then it is too late,

 

and it is my heart, wrecked,

 

in need of a boy, who

 

does not exist,

 

to heal me with affection, which

 

will never be felt


***

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Brandon Stanwyck is a Cleveland-based crewman for film and television productions. Twitter: @BrandonStanwyck | Instagram: @brandoncinema

 

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