Consensual/Daily Mail Order Bride/So Your Wife – by HOLLY DAFFURN

Consensual

For the man who asked if I condoned paedophilia

because I support homosexuality

So I’d offer you my hand,

but before you grasp my skin

You’ll probably want to know

where my fingers have been

My hands show I’m a cellist, a wife, a writer

but there are no clear signs

of every queer all-nighter

Here I am…so married, so feminine, so straight?

There you are so hardened by your bigoted hate

I would apologise

but you’d resent my tongue and lips

To know how I adore the coastline

from breast to hip

But my past is not the force

behind my fighting words

I write and speak this way

for those who don’t get heard.


Daily Mail Order Bride

I think I was the only Guardian reader in history

to marry someone who read The Daily Mail

& I’d think maybe it’s ironic

& at least it isn’t The Sun

Besides, we all like being the intelligent one

We’d be in bed with my arms thus spread

as wide as my mind and heart

You’d be beside with your paper tight

like your wallet and your pride

I was the perfect trophy wife

All blowjob proof lipstick and self-sacrifice

I think you almost knew that I could write

but you didn’t quite grasp that words were my whole life

I’ve wondered, if I write about you

does that mean you ever mattered?

Or that our brief portrait

was anything but lust splattered?

No-one ever really knew

how someone with my MENSA IQ

could ever even fuck the likes of you

I taught you about the hidden gender

new moves

and new words

You taught me through silent imprisonment

the importance of being heard


So Your Wife

So your wife hates my lips

She reads fellatio

Pictures the swell of your dick

She can’t lip read, she doesn’t know the truth

I put my lips to a much better use

Weaving words to inspire, encourage, delight

To chase out the shadows that haunt you at night

It’s words that I give you

a different relief

Yet, she’s searching for semen

in the glint of my teeth

So your wife hates my hands

The caress of a masseuse

Is all she understands

She’s no musician, she doesn’t know the truth

It’s my fingertips that get the most use

That these thick pads, calloused and raw

Show devotion to the instrument

that makes my heart soar

That my nimble fingers and strong hands

Please you as an artist

and not as a man

So your wife hates my pins

She reads seduction

In my barely keeping it in

She can’t see, she doesn’t know the truth

The way I dress is mania put to good use

My lack of boundaries, my style liberated

Simply means I haven’t been medicated

Matching mental disorders, a different connection

I see understanding

She sees attraction

So your wife hates my youth

I’m not even that young

But I’m younger than you

And she’s even longer in the tooth

She can’t see, she doesn’t know the truth

That my life experience has been put to good use

I’ve lived enough life for six

It’s wisdom I offer, not perky tits

It’s insight I give you, and intellect

She sees firm curves

and marriages wrecked

So.. I hate your wife

She’s taken you from you

and withdrawn you from my life

She can’t see, she doesn’t know the truth

That I only ever wanted

What was best for you

You see a person with depth, light and shade

She sees a slut who’s out to get laid

She doesn’t see

That the biggest threat of all

Is that I’ve got you by the soul

and not by the balls


******

hollyd

***Holly Daffurn is an author and a poet. Her debut poetry collection is out next spring and she is currently working on a collection of pregnancy and birthing non-fiction titles for ecological publishing house Green Books. She is a passionate artist on the spoken word scene with a loyalty to Birmingham (her poetic home if not her literal one). Her work includes political pieces such as ‘For Russia with Love’ a performance poem that addresses sexuality and the situation in Russia. This piece was commissioned to be made into a film poem by CAGED Arts as part of The React Poetry Project (An O2 Think Big Project). As well as attracting international attention (including support from a number of Russian LGBT groups) this film poem was also shown at ‘We’re Here’ a queer film screening and art exhibition as part of Brighton Pride 2015.

Most recently Holly was commissioned by the UK’s leading spoken word organisation Apples & Snakes to write and record a podcast on the theme of ‘Heritage’. The resulting broadcast features a collection of poems especially written for the commission as well as Holly’s insight and candid no-holds barred discussion on inherited mental illness, specifically bipolar disorder. This piece has been very well-received including commendation from Ruby Wax’s mental health organisation SANE.

Her work varies from tight rhymes, rapidly changing rhythms and a pleasing mixture of sass and wit to deeply intimate and bleak portraits that are raw in their intimacy. Holly is immensely passionate about giving young people the confidence, skills and incentive to use words to break down barriers, dissolve stigma, express themselves and as a cathartic practice. She has started running workshops that offer young people the space, opportunity and support to get their voices heard.***

To learn more about Holly or see her work, visit these web sites:

Here is a video poem of a piece I wrote about sexuality and

the situation in Russia:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ri0YmdApozE

Here is a video of So Your Wife:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebioIDNyqus

You can find my Apples & Snakes podcast here:

http://applesandsnakesblog.org/blog/sketches-from-both-sides-of-the-sky-by-holly-daffurn

My website is here:

https://hollydaffurn.wordpress.com/

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